On the Saturday before Mother’s Day, Max had Mike take him to Target to get my present, which was a much needed pair of slippers since the dogs slowly but surely ate the last pair. I wore them with their gnawed open toes for a while, but finally Stella ate one so much that I could no longer keep it on my foot while I walked. Max excitedly gave me my new slippers which I was very happy to receive and I placed them on a high shelf when I saw Stella excitedly sniffing them.
But then, later that day, after Max and I went to the planetarium, he told me that the slippers were not really what he wanted to get me. What he really wanted to get me was something he had seen on TV that you could only procure by ordering from TV or at Walgreens. And we just happened to be stopped at a red light with a Walgreens on the corner. So we stopped in.
Max asked me give him $20, point him in the direction of the “see on TV” things, and wait by the front door. So I gave him $20, we wandered up and down the aisles looking for the “Seen in TV” area, and then he selected his gift for me. We went to the checkout line where I was told to wait “over there’ while he paid for this purchase.
And when we got to the car Max showed me my new Hot Buns. What are Hot Buns you ask? Hot Buns are like giant rollers that you roll your hair up in and then snap into a bun. I tried to explain to Max that I did not think my hair was long enough for a hot bun, but this did not deter him. On the car ride home, he read the step by step instructions to me, spelling out the words he could not read, assuring me this was going to be simple and would result in my looking beautiful for my date with Daddy that night. He said, “It’s easy Mom, you just Roll, Snap and Wrap!”
When we got home, Max ran and got a brush and a pony tail holder. He read the instructions to me again instructing me to get all the hair and pull it tight. I think he was disappointed that my hair did not totally cover the hot bun thing, but I assured him I loved it. He told me that if I wore a white dress, it would look even better. I did not even ask where that came from I just said, “Hmmm.”
I spotted him eyeing my hair several times over the course of the next hour while waiting for the babysitter to arrive. I know he was thinking that I had not done it right and that is why the bun did not look like the one on the box. I had tried to explain that the girl on the box had thick hair down to her ass, but I could sense he still thought it was a failure on my part, some inability to manage my own hair.
When I was dressed and ready to go, after Max looked me up and down and asked, “Are you wearing THAT on your date?” and I answered, “Yes I am” to his sigh, the babysitter Victoria arrived with her friend Emily. They walked through the front door with their long luxurious hair and Max ran upstairs to get the other hot bun , the instructions and a brush. I warned the girls that they were in for a hot bun treatment and they were thankfully game. In fact, they had so much fun, these 2 wonderful girls with my sweet boy, that when we got home from the movies, he asked us to leave again so they could stay longer. That easily I was replaced with younger girls who clearly know how to manage their hair.
I suppose it is a preview of what’s to come in a few short years when I can no longer smother him in kisses in public and when he won’t register that it is Mother’s Day much less give me a special gift of Hot Buns. Until then, I will proudly sport my Hot Bun.
P.S. – Just a word of warning…learn from my mistake and do not use your work computer to google images of “hot buns.” You will not get picture of smiling ladies with their hair wrapped into beautiful buns.